Having previously given a speech for a bride and groom at a wedding I know it can be one of the most daunting and uncomfortable tasks. Not only are you nervous but the expectation of the crowd weighs heavy on your shoulders. Wedding toasts and speeches vary for each person whether you are a groomsmen or bridesmaid, maid of honour, family member or friend. Etiquette remains unchanged and steering clear of uncomfortable topics is a must – so we’ve rounded up a list of do’s and don’ts for wedding speeches.
First off let’s begin with the top 5 topics to avoid:
Nothing is more uncomfortable than hearing the gasps of shock and horror listening to the ramblings off of past relationships during ones single days and the gory details of why it never worked. Best to stay clear and let sleeping dogs lie.
An opening line of “Wow this must have cost a fortune” is hardly a clever statement no matter the intention it’s just best to think it and not speak it publicly.
Bride and Groom difficulties during the relationship
Stories outlining the couple’s struggles on road to the altar are personal and better kept that way so please avoid the trip down memory lane and save it for small talk when the time and place is appropriate.
Stories of your own failed marriage
Simply put these stories are for a need to know basis and no one needs to know of your past in this scenario.
Compliments layered in insult- “I never thought he/she would get to this point they are such losers”. Be considerate of who you are honouring and treat them fairly, everyone in the room is listening and speaking openly and warmly will mean so much more. Be kind.
Father of the bride
The father of the bride speeches would generally focus on thanking the guests for attending the wedding and celebrating in this joyous occasion. He would also casually speak of the bride and groom, welcoming his new son/daughter into his family and finally a toast to the bride and groom and their life together.
The groom’s speech should typically centre around thanking the bride’s parents for allowing the marriage, proposing a toast (if applicable) and providing any help with the wedding like, sorting out the catering and their support of make the day possible. Secondly, it’s always a good idea to give your guests some appreciation for their attendance, well wishes and gifts. Then thanking your bridal party for their patience and help as well as any other individuals who assisted. Lastly, addressing your new wife with something more sentimental, tailored to her, focusing on why you love her, your future together and how happy she has made you.
The best man speaks on behalf of the bridal party and wishes the newly-weds well, he will speak of to each the bride and groom, their qualities and why they make a great couple. The best man also typically shares how/when they met as well as personal non-embarrassing stories of the groom. Be sure to keep them funny as these often win over the audience and witty humour is always welcome. It’s best to conclude with a toast and more often read cards/messages of family members.
We hope this guide provided you with lots of information for all your wedding speeches – please let us know if you have any additional points to share by commenting below…
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